New Jersey divorce law firm

Timing Is Everything: Especially When it Comes To Divorce

May 17, 2017

Recently a New Yorker cartoon was circulated around our offices. While this cartoon provides some comic relief, it also made me think of all the planning and consideration that our clients go through before telling his or her spouse that he or she wants a divorce. (Speak with an experienced and dedicated New Jersey divorce lawyer at L&ML Attorneys today)

5 Things You Should Consider Before Filing For Divorce

1. Telling Your Spouse – You vs Third Party

Every client must decide whether he or she is going to break the news or have a third party their attorney reach out.

This can be a particularly hard decision when you and your spouse live together.

2.To File or Not to File

Clients need to decide whether to break the news first or file a Complaint for Divorce before.

Even if you want to be the one to break the news, you can file your Complaint for Divorce and wait to tell your spouse that you want a divorce. Remember, while you may have already come to grips with the end of your marriage, your spouse may be in shock.

3. Kids First

How and what do you tell the children?  Before even telling your spouse, consider what is best for you family, and plan how to tell the children.

4. Third Party Present

You must decide whether it is best to have a family member, therapist, or some other third party present when you tell your spouse.

If your spouse has a history of getting angry, abuse, or depression, it may be practical to have a third party present or available.

5. Safety Issues

Although domestic violence does not occur in every case, incidents are all too frequent.  Many domestic violence victims stay with their partners much longer than they want to because they are scared.

Do you have a safety plan in place before you break the news?  If it is not safe for you to do so, do not break the news yourself.  Instead, speak to one of our divorce attorneys in New Jersey or a domestic violence counselor to help you create a safety plan before telling your spouse.


If you or anyone you know has any further questions about divorce, please contact us.